Perfect parenting, is there such a thing?
Today, parents put an awful lot of pressure on themselves and each other to be these super parents who do everything and anything perfectly. When we don’t follow the exclusively breastfed, bamboo wearing, organic growing lifestyle, we are judged by everyone around us.
I came to the conclusion very early on that it doesn’t matter what wonderful things you are doing with, or for your child, someone is quick to tell you, you are doing something wrong. The media has a lot to answer for. It is a lot of pressure to conform and so I beg the question, why are mum’s so hard on each other?
My saving grace was my awesome local mother’s group. I must admit, I was nervous attending as I could just imagine all these mum’s sitting around comparing prams, outfits, how long their child slept for, how ‘easy natured’ their child was and who was the first to smile, roll, sit etc. Argh!!!
In fact it was the opposite. We talked about how hard things were, the sleepless nights, the painful breastfeeding and the loss of freedom. It was so refreshing to be around like-minded mums who were all there for support and friendship, and not judgement or competition. Not all groups are like mine, so if you are not happy with yours, look for another one!
The difference between ideal parenting and real parenting is interesting. It all started for me with an emergency c-section instead of a vaginal birth. From there, after six extremely difficult months attempting to breastfeed, I finally accepted that it just wasn’t what my body was meant to do. Having a reflux baby who projectile vomited all day and everyday meant I WAS one of those mum’s who left the house with vomit on her clothes. Reality is far from the beautiful picture of motherhood I had in my head pre-baby.
At the end of each day I could reflect on all the things I didn’t do, or things I could have done better OR I can pour that gorgeous glass of wine as I cook baked beans in the microwave and think- I am a great mother, who loves her daughter so very much. I am doing the best that I can!
Cheers and let us celebrate how awesome we all are!